How I Catch Rodents that Get into My House Without Hurting Them

It really pisses me off that people set out traps and poisons to handle a rodent issue. Don’t get me wrong: I don’t want to catch the bubonic plague.

I also don’t want to be responsible for the murder of a helpless animal.

If you don’t like the idea of death and destruction in the name of pest control either, here’s what I do to keep my home safe without hurting any of the critters.

Step #1: Give Them Lots of Peanut Butter

All animals love peanut butter. That’s a proven fact! If it isn’t, someone needs to get some clinical research done on this information, stat.

Step #2: Add Loganberry Paste

This stuff works miracles. If there’s an animal close to the live trap, it’ll come to inspect the food. I caught an armadillo once with it. I’ve also snagged Lucy, the neighbor’s tabby cat, at least four times. My nephew even tried to steal it once, but I stopped the attempt.

Step #3: Check the Trap Frequently

Rats are hungry little rodents. Most other small animals follow the same behavior. You’ve got to watch out for raccoons because they get feisty. Have you ever had one of them scream at you? It’s a life-changing experience! I like to check it hourly once it is baited.

Step #4: Release the Animal Outside of Your House

Mice and rats usually need to get released about 100 yards from your property to prevent them from dying. Since that’s my neighbor’s yard, it works out perfectly. Raccoons, opossums, and larger rodents can go further away. You’ve got to be careful about transportation laws because rabies rules could get you in some trouble.

Step #5: Rodent-Proof Your Home

You can seal your home to prevent intrusions. Some spots, like your car’s engine, require a deterrent instead. I like to use bear repellent. As an extra benefit, that technique keeps my neighbor from complaining about the rats I dump in his yard.

I’m telling you that this plan works well. If we ever get to share a cup of coffee, you’ll love how I catch bats in my house without hurting them!